Bye So

For now. You were pretty sad when you said you wanted to go to So tomorrow. I'm sorry. It's going to be completely new tomorrow. Unfortunately, there's no way to transition into it. You're just gonna have to get up to speed as fast as you can. A month will go by fast. You even get a bonus day with mommy and daddy for July 3rd (4th).

We spent a lot of money today to get you lunch for your time at Champions. Now be a champion and do good there okay? I'll give you a quarter if you do. I'd want to take you to buy a toy tomorrow, but I don't want to spoil you too much. It's such a delicate balance. Be thankful that we have the resource to give you the best. Good luck to us all tomorrow...

Happy Birthday

Sorry, we tricked you. It's just an early celebration at So that way your friends don't miss out since your birthday is during the break from So. Hmmm, maybe we should get cupcakes for your friends at Champions. Mommy might be frugal, but I can pay for it. Depends on the kids ages at the program I guess and how you get along. We'll see...

I keep trying and failing at winning the lottery. Sorry that I'm not that good at winning. But know that I'm trying had to win so that I don't have to work and can spend more time with you. Hopefully, it'll only be 10 more years at most, but by that time, I'm not sure you'll still want to hang out...

Ahead of Time

Look who was super cute and had so much fun today at Aunty Joanne and Uncle TJ's house. It was cousin Caleb's graduation. Actually, mommy didn't like the picture so we will use another one...I'm sorry you had to hear and witness mommy and me arguing. But maybe it's good. Relationships aren't about perfection. They're about being able to coexist and work together to solve problems.

Mommy and Daddy are still working to figure out how to solve problems. I think mommy might need different motivation. I know quarters worked for you. We'll need to find the right motivation for mommy...

Quarters Galore

It's only been a few days, but quarters are causing you to do what you're supposed to do. I wish you could do things on your own, but this is a start. And it shows, that you are able to do what you're supposed to do.  I don't want to always have to use quarters as behavioral tools, but at least it works for now. It may not always work...

We are going to Aunty Joanne and Uncle TJ's later today. You're going to need to be super good. There are people there you don't see often so it's important that you show them your best. Lots of quarters for you. Right now you even wanted to sleep by yourself to get a quarter. I was gonna sleep with you too. LOL. Anyhow, keep listening to your parents and coaches and you'll get lots of quarters. When you're an adult, you can make bad decisions if you want. We hope you don't...

Spend, Share, Save

Alliteration is so cool. I'm hoping this is a good thing. I was thinking, at the rate of payment, you'll get more than 1 toy a week. Hopefully, making you save and share will slow it down. Although, I was asking mommy, what you're saving for...

Anyhow, you seem to understand. I'm gonna try to teach you about cents, nickels, and dimes too. That way you can earn more. Maybe, we'll charge you a fine when you're bad? Not sure, but at least it something you seem to easily pickup and motivates you. Motivation is important. Hopefully, you'll learn to channel it in a good way for good things...

I Have An Idea...

Probably not an original one, but original to you. How about we start paying you to be good? Sounds bad when I say it out loud, but it's to motivate your simple mind to do what you're supposed to be doing anyways until you learn to do what you're supposed to do on your own. At that time we can transition it to an allowance for chores?

It will also teach you the value of money at an early age so you understand that it doesn't fall from the sky and that you need to work for it. And that you need to save, share, and spend it. Anyhow, I think mommy is on board and I'm glad you only know about Dollar Tree, although I'm not sure what kind of quality you get. Maybe you can try Temu? But then you'd have to wait...

Daddy, Can you ______ me ______?

You just asked me if I can buy you more toys. I think it's because I bought you toys yesterday out of the blue. I thought we did a good job of making your gift binder, but I might have ruined that with my actions yesterday. I'm sorry. It's not that we can't afford to buy you anything you want. You won't understand it until you're older probably. It's because we shouldn't buy you anything you want.

Scarcity gives things meaning. As does the opposite. If you always get what you want, what will happen when you finally don't? They say that "friction" is an important part of your development. Making your life easy can have negative impacts in the long run because you won't be able to figure your way out of complex or difficult situations. It seems like you understand that it's okay to lose, but that applies to things you may not want to lose as well. Anyhow, I'll try to reset your desire for buying things. However, if you want me to print something for you, that I can always do...

Happy Days

I hope that all your days are happy, but that's probably unrealistic. I'll settle for you having more happy days than unhappy ones. I'll try my best to sacrifice my own happiness and do whatever I can to make sure you get as many happy days as possible. The only exception is if your happy days is a bad thing. I'm sorry, but if doing the right thing or giving you a happy day are the choices, I will probably have to do the right thing. Sorry.

I hope you never have to make tough choices in life, but that's probably unrealistic. I hope that when the choices is made, you do the right thing, even if it doesn't benefit you. Principles and morals are hard things to hold true to in this world. I imagine it will only get more complicated for you. Until then, enjoy the happy days.

"Graduations"

The first of many. I don't recall if we had one at Merryhill or not. You did good. Much better than at Cha's 25th anniversary. Anyhow, I'm sorry you don't get to go to Edna Batey next year. It's unfortunate, but it is what it is. Who knows, maybe you don't want to go, but we didn't ask and you're probably intimidated by a new environment. Fortunately, it's only another year. Your cousin Aiden seems to be adjusting well. I wonder if we will or need to enroll you in tutoring. I think you're pretty smart already...three twos is six...#numberofblueberriesyoulleatfordaddynottobesad

I'm sorry you didn't get a graduation bag, but you didn't graduate. I hope you understand that you can't always get what you want. You tell me that it's okay to lose, but I wonder if you only do that when it's okay for you. Same goes, it's okay to not always get presents. If you always get them, they'll lose their meaning. In life, expectations can mess up your reality. I hope you don't let that happen to you. *pray*

Father's Day 2026

Thanks for making me a Father. I have to be honest and say it's not something I expected or ever wanted to do, but you make doing it a little easier (most of the time). I truly believe it wasn't your choice to be here, so I have to give you some grace when you're difficult. But since you are here, and it's partly my fault that you're here, I will make your life as great as possible.

I'll try to work and fit into this shirt better. I'll try to stay alive for as long as you need me. I'll try not to be a burden on you. I'll try to give you whatever you need to be a successful member of society. Being a father and you being a person are both firsts for us. It's important that we work together to help each be the best version we can. Cheers to another Father's Day.

Karma

I did used to make fun of your cousin Evan when he was "playing soccer". Anyhow, it's good for you to stay active and find out what you like and what you're good at. We don't need you to become the next Messi or Ronaldo, but it couldn't hurt for your own future.

Again, you're very lucky. Daddy and mommy did not have the luxury of exploring things when we were growing up. I really hope you take a liking to golf. It'll be great way for us to spend time together and give mommy her own time. And you're lucky that we can afford to golf. I was golfing with a guy that enjoyed golf as a kid, but they couldn't afford it. He regrets it.

Juneteenth

We both didn't get the day off, but we did get to spend extra time together. Mommy went to church for a long time. That meant more time for Vinh to color with Daddy.

Good thing I got more tape. It's a great example of how lucky you are. I don't expect you to act grateful all the time, but you probably should understand sooner than later that your actions have consequences. I keep telling you that it's okay to feel your feelings, but it's not okay to act out how you act out. These walls could be bare and you could have no toys...

What To Eat?

You're already checking the fridge for food. Yet, you don't eat enough. I saw a picture of your Uncle Peter's twins. They turned 1 year old today. I think they're probably bigger than you. Crazzzzy. Luck is not on your side when it comes to your parents. It's important that you get enough nutrition in order to maximize your height potential...

Anyhow, you peed your pants last night. I vacuumed and cleaned your room and my office. I had to wash all the sheets and pillow cases and blankets. I do that normally, but had to do it today because I didn't know what items you actually soiled and didn't want you sleeping in that. Smells kinda like corn, weird. It's crazy that you peed the one day you didn't wear a diaper. All cause your butt is sweaty. You're gonna have to wear a diaper tonight...

Compartmentalize

Boxes 📦 in a sense. I know you’re not great at putting stuff away or where it goes, but I think it’s important that you learn to focus sometimes. Tunnel vision. Multitasking is a great skill too. Again, I think it’s going to take wisdom to know when to do what. So pray for wisdom…

I enjoy the flexibility of work, letting it blend into life, but I think I need to take a break and set some boundaries. Right now you’re swimming and I’m watching you so I’ll try not to do any work. I just need to make sure I’m putting in sufficient time and that my work is getting done. But maybe only do it when I don’t have to focus on you. I wish you the ability to be wise in how you use your time. Sorry we didn't win the lottery, so you'll have to go to So tomorrow...

Not Good

When you say you won't do it again, it means you won't do it again, but then you do it again. That's not good my son. It's also not good that your life is so blessed and yet you act so entitled. We give you everything you want pretty much, so you need to do what you're supposed to do. Which his listen, behave, and be nice...

You're good at organizing and doing things you like. What you're going to learn (and the sooner the better) is that life is a lot about doing things you don't want to do and smiling while you do it. It's better than people can't read your face. It'll get you far in life. You often ask Daddy why I'm not happy, it's because you don't behave. I need you to do that and I'll be happy, so happy!!!!

Mondays

You slept with Daddy last night. Mommy was okay with it. You woke me up to pee in the middle of the night. I'm glad it was me and not Mommy. Mommy has to go to the doctor tonight so it'll be me and you this evening. Don't give me a hard time. I'm super nice to you and your life is easy peasy lemon squeazy. It's too bad you didn't want to color this coloring page. I think it's pretty cool.

I haven't been able to work as much as I'd like outside the work hours. Even though it's not ideal, it's what I do to make sure I have more flexibility with you. Anyhow, I hope you have a good day at soccer practice today. I'm sorry it's gonna be hot. Good thing tonight is a good night to shampoo your hair. At least next time you're outside when it's hot, it'll be for swim lessons. Thanks for not falling off the bed or crying when you got up this morning. See, I know you can do it. You're not a baby :)

Practice

Golf and golfing Father's Day. Please be good with Mommy while I'm golfing. I don't get many opportunities to do things I enjoy without impacting Team Matcha Boba. So I truly appreciate the chances I get to golf and play mahjong. I wish I could get home sooner Father's Day, but Uncle Peter can't wake up earlier...unless it's for fishing. One truth I want to share with you is that there are very few things in life you cannot accomplish. You can't grow taller, but pretty much, anything else you can do...as long as it's important enough for you to do it.

It's not easy to admit or hear, but I really believe that to be an important truth. Sometimes the things that are uncomfortable to hear are the things you need to hear...I promise I will try to never say things to be mean or that don't need to be said. All I do is in hopes of making you and your life the best it can be. For now, mommy and my definitions of "best" will reign, but we understand that someday, we will have to let you figure out "best" on your own...*pray* 

So Saturday

We got to go to Saturday church today. It sure makes less stress tomorrow. I'm sorry that your performance wasn't as great as it could have been, but we know how great you are. It was really funny seeing the girl in front of us in church watching a video of you singing. Also so cute that Jasmine was looking at Team Milk Tea Boba all mass long (probably cause you're so loud...)

I owe you presents and treats. We will get you something, but you might have forgotten. The better you are the better life is for everyone involved. I can't stress that enough. Please keep getting smarter and being better behaved. You can't imagine how happy mommy and daddy are when you make us proud. I know there will always be times we'll be disappointed, but I hope they're farther and fewer between...

Happy Mommy-versary

It's been (5) years since mommy and daddy officially because Team Matcha Milk Tea. You make us Team Boba :) Are you so lucky that so many people love you. Those hulk smash hands did not fall from the sky. It's kind of cute how you wanted to go to Aunty Rain and Ong Ba and it wasn't even for snacks. You even turned down snacks when we were there. So I know you have self control. I hope you keep that discipline on important things all your life.

It's too bad you got quickly tired and opted not to see Ong Ba, but they didn't know you were coming so it's okay. We will see them all on Father's Day. I don't like you not being happy, but I also don't like you not being a good boy. I hope you'll continue to be carefree and laughing and sweet, but we're gonna need you to be a very good boy...

Trying

We really are trying to get a sibling for you. This is gonna be our third attempt at IVF. Not sure if you'll know what that means by the time you read this, but just know (although we started late), we are making an effort to expand our family. This is my half of the cost of the recent attempt.

I know you will never really be alone, but I also know it can be lonely alone as a child. You always want mommy and daddy to watch or play with you. I'm sorry that we can't always do that. I will make a conscious effort to do more of that (including watching your shows with you), but it also is important for you to learn to be independent. Just like with work, you need to be a good independent worker along with being a good team collaborator. Prayers the third time is a charm...

Why Can't You Be Happy Daddy?

I'll be happy when you listen and eat good. It's very sweet of you to ask and try to make me happy though. I wish you understood that if you did what you're supposed to do, everyone's' lives around you would be better and easier. I just saw a post about how success is how humans were programmed. Birds don't need lessons to fly. Fish don't need lessons to swim. Humans don't need lessons to be successful. You just need to follow the plan.

You also don't see fish swimming in the sky or birdies flying in the water. Sometimes the reason why you may not be successful is because you're not where you're supposed to be. Just like how a bottle of water is $0.25 at Costco, but $6.00 at the airport. Your value can change based on where you are. Just some things to think about...

Wisdom

And grit. Those are really important things to have. There's still quite a bit of milk tea here, but I threw it away anyways. It wasn't great so I don't need to consume the extra calories. It may be a little waste of money, but it's worth the sacrifice to not consume unnecessary stuff. It's the same with life. You have to know when to walk away. It might mean you lose a little, but it could save you from losing a lot more.

Grit will help you keep going when the going gets tough. I wish that it was easy to determine when it's best to walk away and when it's best to keep going. So I pray that you'll develop your own wisdom and be able to use that to make your life easier and better. Don't keep making life harder than it should be. Patience my grasshopper.

Soccer

You did good. The kids seem nice and the so do the coaches. It seems like you might be okay. Unfortunately, it did not wear you out as you were not tired when you got home. But maybe you will be the first Vietnamese soccer star? As long as you can take care of yourself, I'll be happy. You don't need to take care of me. I will try not to be a burden on you.

We don't have your first game until next weekend so you still have one more practice. Wonder how long photo day will be Saturday. I'm not golfing just for you buddy. I will try to have at least one day in the weekend for family time. Sorry that it can't be the same day every week.

Last Sunday Evening Mass

We hopefully won't go to Sunday evening mass until you skip nap time. It's just too much mommy says. You don't look this happy when we wake you up to go to Sunday mass and it makes it a rush to end the weekend. I think it's better if you guys had went to mass without me today, but mommy didn't want to do that. Sorry. I'm okay if no one rubs my head and says "Nice haircut sir..."

I don't have a photo from Sunday because I didn't take one. We had good sushi and you ate good and we saw bac Minh, Ong Ba and your cousins. It was quite a productive day. I went golfing too. Anyhow, it's back to the grind tomorrow. Hope you have a great week!

Party Time

You got to hang out with your friends and their parents today. Boy did you have a good time. Maybe too good of a time, but that’s okay. I’m sorry you don’t have a sibling or hang out with friends in the regular, but at least you have So. That’s why you need to go (and because mommy and daddy work).

I don’t know if we’re going to buy Jasmine a scooter, but you do need to learn to respect people’s personal space. Not sure how we can teach that effectively, but we need to try because we don’t want anyone feeling uncomfortable around you…

Whoa

Who's super smart and compassionate? This guy...

Who's also not so smart and sometimes mean? Same guy. LOL. Anyhow, I really appreciate the positives you demonstrate. Ironically, it makes the negatives much more frustrating. I know you're only 3 years old, but you're so smart and compassionate already. I hope the world and life doesn't erode those qualities. I hope that life and the world will erode the negative stuff. As you mature and understand more, I pray you use that evolution to reduce the bad and increase the good. Good boys get whatever they want from their parents. You can have all the tow trucks and race tracks you want if you're good...

Lemonade

Or whatever you can make with what you have. Life is going to throw lots at you. Some good things that end up being bad. Some bad things that you can turn into good. I've repeated this lesson before, but it's good to repeat it again because it's an important part of life. Rolling with the punches and getting up when life knocks you down.

I left this in the car yesterday and by the time I got to it this morning it had all melted. I was having a rough day and needed a treat and this is what I found. Instead of staying sad, I went ahead and brought it in so that I could and did eat it later (until it got contaminated). Which according to Aunty Rain, could be part of the burnt toast theory. Maybe this was the universe telling me I should get a better treat tomorrow...which leads to my reminder that you need to be patient :) 

Vinh-tivities

Are we making you do too many things? Would you rather do nothing? I think growing up, I played after school with friends and then went home and did homework. I don't think I watched any TV besides maybe on Saturday mornings. I also remember I had to vacuum the house. I really don't know how I spent my time considering I didn't have a gaming system or toys...

I know part of the reason we want you to do things is to keep you busy. It's to find something that you might like and pursue further. It's also a little of making up for what we didn't have or couldn't do. Small part of it is probably showing others what we do for you. Anyhow, I hope we're doing the right thing and that we don't do more harm than good. It was interesting to see the range of kids at the pool today. I think they're all older than you. I hope you're able to swim like them soon...

Catch Up

Not on life, but on work. Right now, mommy has you. I'm gonna try to get some work done this evening. Aunty Lorraine is still out and I'm trying not to bother her too much. I really hope you never look and think I never have enough time for you. I think I do a pretty good job of being there for the important things and making sure I am flexible and can be at all the other things. It really is true what they say, I will try to raise you as best as I can and hope you forgive me. Looking back, I don't blame Ong or Ba for anything. I think they did a pretty good job with what they had.

It's quite different with you. We have so much more than Ong and Ba could have ever dreamed of providing me. You have more than I could have ever imagined as a kid. I hope that doesn't ruin your life. Rather, I hope you're able to be like Archimedes. You'll be able to see farther because you stood on the shoulder of giants (Mommy and Daddy)...

Hellllloooooo June!

And so the heat begins. I can hear the Tesla cooling right now. I hope that's normal... That traffic detour was crazy today, but at least you got more time with daddy and you were still first to So. So even mentioned that LOL. We didn't get a photo on Saturday, but here's a photo of the cute shirts we wore. Just a reminder that we're a family.

I was walking to my car at work today and it was parked on the roof of my building. Had a nice sense of calm as I was leaving. Aunty Lorraine is not working the next few days and so I got extra work. Not to mention I had extra personal stuff like dentist, errands, tires for Ong. Anyhow, my 45th birthday is coming soon. I'm gonna try to use that as a marker for getting life together before I turn 50. I hope you always stay on top of your goals. Time pressures may help, but I hope you never have to rely on them.